That's What I Say, It's Not What I Mean
by berrywarbler
Summary: rachel's never backed down from a challenge, and blaine is nothing if not that. he's always up for a game, even if she turns out to be more than he expected.


**a/n: **written for day 2 of blainchel week: au day. thank you forever as always to the quinn to my rachel; kira (claddaugh ring). she is a phenomenal human being who puts up with me and reads over every paragraph as it comes to me. these days, she's as much a process of my writing as the actual writing is. worship her.

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><p>Rachel had always been upset that she herself couldn't attend Dalton, ever since she was in fourth grade and one of her fathers became the chairman of the Board, her other becoming Headmaster within a few months. The teachers knew her, the staff watched her carefully as she walked down sculpted staircases and wandered through often empty hallways. They let her sit in on classes when she was younger, the prep school boys entertaining her and showering her with attention like 30 big brothers. She loved it there, and while she settled into Crawford her freshman year well, but she never got on as well with the girls there than she ever did with the boys from Dalton.<p>

When she was stopped one day, her freshman year, wandering through the Dalton library by a boy in a blazer asking who she was and what she was doing-something most had stopped asking even as she got older-she merely smiled at him and introduced herself. It took some convincing and proof of ID, but eventually the boy-Wesley, she soon learned, though he preferred Wes-believed her, and not long after that the pair went out for coffee.

Three weeks later, Rachel Berry was officially dating Wesley Montgomery, the boy rising through the elite collection of Warblers with surprising ease, and she found herself spending even more time in Dalton.

That had been two years ago, and now Rachel was a junior and still spent more time avoiding Crawford and it's cramped buildings as she escaped to Dalton. She had become almost a permanent fixture, despite the schools 'no girls' rule, often found with Wes's arm wrapped around her while she watched with a bemused expression as David tried, in vain, to show them just how well he could breakdance in the middle of the senior lounge.

"Does he do this all day long?" she asked with a small laugh as David continued to sing loudly to the music playing despite Wes's attempts at doing his physics homework, Rachel's own put away for the afternoon. As much as she loved spending time at Dalton, it was a place full of distracting boys who were constantly busy in one scheme or another, almost as bad as the girls from her own school.

"I think you know well enough by now that yes, Rachel Berry, I do," David answered for Wes before laying down on the carpeted floor, breathing heavy as Wes just shook his head.

"And you're only here for a few hours of it," he told her dryly. "I have to live in the same room as it."

"Him! Wesley, we've discussed this! I am a 'him', not an 'it'!" David ranted, Rachel watching with amusement. She was used to the two bickering and fighting, more used to it than she probably should have been, and some of the other Warblers often joked that if she wasn't careful, David was going to move in on her boyfriend.

She loved spending time with the Warblers, Crawford lacking their own music program despite Rachel's efforts to start one herself, and they often let her sit in on rehearsals and-despite reluctance from some-coach them as well. There was only one who ever had any sort of problem with her, though Wes promised her that it wasn't _her_, per say, it was just how he was. They put up with Sebastian Smythe because of his talent, and because they had to, but there was something about the boy that got under her skin. Whenever he started sending his inappropriate comments her way, Wes was sure to lead her away, his face set in a grim resignation that with the no-tolerance rules at Dalton, there wasn't much he could say without getting in trouble himself.

She knew she could tell her fathers about him, send him on his way, but she didn't want to become _that _girl, enjoying her reputation merely as the honorary Warbler and ignored him to the best of her abilities.

It was a lot easier said than done, however, especially when he had an uncanny ability of finding wherever she was on the schools grounds and showing up. When he walked in, a boy following that she'd never seen before, she was ready to pull Wes up and away before any words could be exchanged, but as usual Sebastian was one step ahead of her. "And this is the senior commons, where you'll often find the king and queen of the Warblers with their third wheel, the headmasters daughter."

"Headmasters daughter?" the short boy asked at the same time David went to argue the statement with "Excuse me, but I think Thad will be completely heartbroken that you consider me to be the king of the Warblers and not him."

"Don't be ridiculous, David. You're the queen," Sebastian said easily, Rachel focused on the boy he had come in with. New students weren't exactly a rarity at Dalton, but she rarely interacted with them since she didn't _attend _the school, sticking mostly to the small group Wes had carved out for them. It got a little boring, sometimes, but Rachel was happy and never even thought about finding someone else in the entire two years they'd been together, never thought about any other boy being attractive even if she was constantly surrounded by them.

But there was something about this one, as David and Sebastian started bickering and throwing insults at one another, his hazel eyes almost golden as they glinted with the hint of amusement, Rachel's tongue darting out to wet her lips as her eyes traveled across broad shoulders and down a lean body. She didn't realize what she was even doing until Wes told the two to calm down once more, her attention brought back to the situation at hand and she had enough decency to blush when she realized he had been returning her gaze.

"Who is the new guy anyways," David asked, brushing off invisible lint from his navy blazer as he stood, shooting daggers in Sebastian's direction. Rachel had the suspicion Sebastian had gotten the last word in before Wes silenced them, something that would irk David for at least 24 hours.

"Blaine," Sebastian answered for him, "Blaine Anderson."

"I didn't realize we had to go on a last name basis," Blaine quipped, Rachel fighting off her own small laugh as his eyes found hers again, Wes resting his hand on her knee almost as if he could tell she wasn't focused on him.

"Well, if you wait about 3 more seconds I'm sure Wes will tell you his entire name and probably his genealogy and how everyone in his family is Dalton bred and then inform you completely about Rachel's while David tries, in vain, to make horrible innuendos that don't work in any sort of way," Sebastian shrugged, his arms crossed over his chest even as Wes rolled his eyes in annoyance, gathering his school work before grabbing Rachel's hand and pulling her with him off the couch.

"It's nice to meet you, Blaine," Wes said shortly as they neared the two boys, "though if you want to make actual friends in this school, I suggest you stay away from Sebastian."

"I'll keep that in mind," Blaine said dryly, his features even more classically handsome close up than they had been from across the room before Wes was dragging Rachel away once more, Rachel trying in vain to fight off the small shudder at the light grasp on her wrist as Blaine held onto her for a moment, stilling her movements. "I hope I get to see you more often," he grinned, and Rachel couldn't do anything but flush a hot pink across her skin before Wes was pulling her away, muttering about assholes who didn't understand limits.

Rachel tried to agree.

* * *

><p>Blaine had absolutely no desire to attend a prep school in the middle of nowhere, but his father hadn't exactly given him an option. After he was released from Nightingale, his doctors impressed with his recovery but warning his parents not to send him to a public school just yet, frightened about a relapse, Blaine was forced into Dalton and handed a navy blazer. He'd merely raised an eyebrow, keeping silent at the exchange.<p>

For a school full of boys, gossip traveled fast. Blaine did nothing to quell the rumors that he had come from the teen rehabilitation center because of drugs, because of fighting, alcoholism, worse. He merely watched with an amused smirk as most avoided him, the only one brave enough to venture near a taller boy who spent the entirety of their Spanish class muttering under his breath about how stupid the subject was. He introduced himself about halfway through when he noticed Blaine's quiet chuckle, hand extending with a simple "Sebastian," not asking Blaine for his own name. Blaine had a feeling Sebastian didn't really care, as long as he had someone listening to him.

By the end of the day, Sebastian seemed to have permanently attached himself to Blaine's side, telling him the ins and outs of Dalton-the parties the upperclassmen would occasionally hold in the senior commons, the Warblers-"It sounds lame, singing with a bunch of guys, but my father wants me to be 'well rounded' so there's no chance for Yale to reject me next year,"-the easiest way to sneak off campus and do whatever the fuck they wanted.

"I'm surprised anyone around here even knows how to have fun," Blaine remarked dryly, fidgeting slightly in his tie. It wasn't comfortable, this attire, and he sighed in annoyance once more as he realized that he was only going to be able to relax on the weekends, and not even then. Dalton's curriculum was rough, and with Blaine nearly a year behind-he had been transferred in as a junior, even if he was nearly 18-he really had a lot to catch up to.

"They get a little stir-crazy here, and other than Rachel we don't really get a lot of girls wandering through the halls-"

"Rachel?" Blaine asked, confused, Sebastian nodding.

"You'll see her before long. Dating the leader of the Warblers, daughter to the headmaster. She's the only girl allowed in the hallowed halls of Dalton, apparently," Sebastian smirked. "Not that she takes advantage of the fact that pretty much any guy around would want to get her off around here, since she's stuck with the most boring guy on the planet."

It turned out that Sebastian was right, on all accounts-they ran into Rachel without fail, as well as her boyfriend who seemed less than attentive to the girl next to him. He could only watch in amusement as she blatantly checked him out, grinning when he realized that if he could pull in a girl of her caliber while wearing the world's worst school uniform, he had nothing to worry about on the having fun part.

It was almost fun to toy with her as she passed him, Blaine ignoring the small spark that seemed to occur between them when his hand landed on her skin before she was ushered out by the boyfriend who merely looked irritated at the intrusion of their studying than anything else. "Told you," Sebastian muttered under his breath as they left the other boy alone once more, heading back towards the dorms. "She's hot, she has free reign of this campus, and they spend their time _studying_. It's nauseating."

"She didn't look like she wanted to study," Blaine mused aloud, Sebastian raising an eyebrow in his direction.

"Really? You saw her for 2 minutes, and you think you can have a better shot of luring her from her picture perfect life than anyone else in this school?"

"It wouldn't take that much," Blaine shrugged, nonchalance and confidence pouring out of him in such a natural way that Sebastian just shook his head, laughing slightly.

"Please, she's like-the queen of this place. Guys have been trying to get her attention for years, and she barely even notices them. Unless, of course, they're on the Warblers. She's attracted to talent, apparently."

"I assume Wesley must be incredibly talented then," Blaine remarked, Sebastian chuckling.

"Let's hope so, cause I'm sure he isn't in the bedroom," Sebastian joked, and now it was Blaine's turn to laugh.

"So, the Warblers, huh?" Blaine asked after a moment, eyes sparkling with mischief.

"You're really going to try and get into her pants, aren't you Anderson?" Sebastian shaking his head as Blaine grinned in response.

"I'm not going to try, Smythe," Blaine retorted. "I'm going to succeed."

His audition to the Warblers went off without a hitch, Blaine glad for once that his mother had sent him and Cooper to theater camps in the summer when he was younger. His voice was a little rough, having not sang for so long, but he quickly learned they usually only had one soloist anyways, and while they could compete for solos within the group no one ever really succeeded in performing besides their designated performer-who happened to be Sebastian.

He was now stuck in the blazer an extra two to three hours of his day, but he also often saw Rachel as she popped in unexpectedly, sometimes bringing snacks with her like the Stepford housewife she seemed to be. He watched her, quietly, eyes trailing over her small frame before they'd catch her own, a blush crawling over her cheeks when she was caught staring in his direction. Sebastian muttered about how she never paid the rest of them any attention, and when Blaine finally asked-in an annoyed tone-if Sebastian was harboring some sort of feelings for her, the boy denied it.

"Unless you're counting 'girls I'd fuck on the council's table' kind of feelings, in which case, definitely yes," Sebastian shrugged. "Feelings shouldn't last longer than an hour, tops."

Blaine had nodded in agreement, even as he circled closer and closer to the girl. He wasn't interested in her life, in dating her. He was attracted to her, and she was there all the time in her short skirts and cardigans that he wanted to rip apart just to hear her scandalized gasp before he took her against a wall.

Still, for a girl like her, he'd have to initiate some sort of contact, be on her radar as more than the new guy in the Warblers. It wasn't that he was terrified, or nervous, because that would be an emotional attachment-and Blaine strictly didn't do that anymore. He hadn't done it since the age of 10, and he sure as hell wouldn't start now.

* * *

><p>If Wes noticed that she was appearing more and more often to the Warblers rehearsals, he didn't say a word. She'd sit quietly and work on her own homework as they ran through songs over and over, harmonizing in ways that made her wish she had her own choral group to lead.<p>

She used to love watching Wes take charge of the Warblers, direct them when they were off-pitch and stride around the room making sure everyone was pulling their weight, the power drawing her to him. But lately she paid more attention to the newest member, the one whose shoulders she found herself dreaming about grabbing onto, whose hands she let herself fantasize about in the privacy of her dorm when no one else was awake on her floor.

She knew she should stay away from Blaine, stop coming to rehearsals and meet up with Wes on neutral territory. But the more she thought about that, about clinging onto the boyfriend she'd been crazy head over heels in love with only two weeks ago, the more she gravitated towards Blaine.

She didn't dare speak to him in front of Wes, and for good reason. The first time she ran into him unattended, him sitting outside in just a Dalton PE teeshirt and jeans one Saturday a few weeks after his transfer, her voice almost cracked at her passing greeting.

"Where you going?" he asked with a look that could only be called a leer, and he didn't even try to hide the fact that he was checking her out as his tongue ran across his lower lip to wet it, an action Rachel wanted desperately to repeat with her own.

"To meet up with Wesley," she replied immediately, keeping her voice steady and firm and hoping it didn't betray her desire for him to ask her to join him, if only for a bit.

"So you two can sit there and do homework again?" Blaine teased, "That sounds horrendously boring."

"It's not boring," she shot back immediately, defensive of something she wasn't even sure she should have been defensive about. "It's-we care about our studies. He wants to get into Harvard, you know, and I have my sights set on NYU."

"NYU?" Blaine asked with a raised eyebrow, the slightest bit of interest behind his normal detached manner.

"They have an acting program I'd like to get involved in, not that it's any of your business," she replied haughtily, Blaine sitting in silence at her words even if his eyes held steady with her own. She didn't back down from the glance, meeting it with one of equal intensity. One that she hoped screamed _leave me alone _rather than _drag me off alone_, though when he finally turned his head she was sure the smirk on his face showed that she had failed. Miserably.

"Well, if you ever want any help breaking into the video sector, let me know," he winked, standing up and brushing past her as the meaning of his words sunk in, Rachel whirling around on her heel indignantly.

"_Excuse me_?" she shrieked, Blaine laughing as she stormed after him, aware that he was heading in the opposite direction of Wes's dorm but trailing afterwards. "Did you just ask me if-"

"I am simply volunteering my services," Blaine interrupted, "since I'm sure your poster boy of a boyfriend would never want to do anything so 'outlandish'," he said, including air quotes and a roll of his eyes around the words. "If you ever want someone who can actually get you off, I'm around."

"That-rude-accusation," she sputtered, not even sure which problem she wanted to tackle first.

"Just stating what I see," he returned, still heading for an unknown destination before Rachel grabbed his arm to force him to face her.

"You have no right to say anything!" she yelled, aware that if anyone wandered around they'd be drawn into the argument, rumors spreading before she could stop them and her reputation essentially damaged. "You don't know me, and you don't know Wes or my relationship with him. So keep your comments to yourself, or I'll-"

"What, tell your dads? I'm terrified," he deadpanned, and for a moment it was like all the joking spark had disappeared from his eyes, something much less alive coloring them now and it frightened her, a bit. Not for herself, because even if she didn't know him, and even if he commented on what he clearly thought was a lack of sex life for her, she trusted that he wouldn't do anything drastic.

"Just, leave me alone," she hissed, Blaine just staring back at her with a raised eyebrow for a moment before he leaned over, her breath stilling as his landed on her ear, his hand on her waist and pulling her towards him slightly as he bit down on her ear gently. She seemed to lose all sense of balance at the action, completely taken off guard and fighting against every instinct in her body that wanted to pull him to a hidden corner and devour him whole.

"Stop staring at me then," he whispered, words tickling against her skin as it prickled underneath the sensation.

And almost immediately, he retracted, disappearing entirely so that by the time her eyes were open again and her breathing was steady, he was nowhere to be found.

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><p>It was even easier than Blaine had expected, to work his way under her skin. A few well-placed words, a few touches she wasn't expecting that he knew goody-two-shoes Wesley wouldn't risk in such a public setting, and she was practically melting into him.<p>

Still, he took his time with her. He knew when she did crack, it would be worth it, and somehow it made him want to toy with her more. She didn't show up at the Warblers practices for a few days after their encounter in the quad over the weekend, one of the boys who Blaine didn't know commenting on her absence, Wesley telling them all she had a cold and hadn't been seen since Friday night. Blaine had bit back his smirk at that one, victory written all over his face as Sebastian cornered him later on.

"Seriously? Already?"

"Not yet," he replied casually, flipping a page of his pre-calculus book as if he was really studying. "But I'm getting there."

Sebastian let out a low whistle, clearly impressed as he shook his head. "Never thought I'd see the day Dalton's princess got swept away from her prince."

"Don't treat her like a princess and she would have left him earlier," Blaine said, Sebastian only chuckling in response.

But he could see more and more why they all did dote on her. Not only was she one of the only girls they saw on a regular basis, outside of teachers she was really the only one, but she seemed to have some hold over every boy she ran into. Whether they were purely platonic, as her and David seemed to be as they argued over which version of _Footloose _was better in the senior commons while others tried to study, or jealous of the attention she got as Thad clearly was, huffing and leaving whenever she was around, or in love with her-as Wes claimed he was, though Blaine had yet to see evidence of it.

He watched the two of them carefully, Wesley's movements around her almost orchestrated, rarely actually touching. He didn't really understand how he wasn't constantly running a hand over her legs, up her skirts, across her stomach, over her chest, but those were thoughts he kept for when he was alone, using his hand as a poor substitute as he imagined her spread apart for him.

He realized he was using her as a distraction, but she served as a good one. If his thoughts were plagued with long legs and a pretty pink mouth, he wasn't thinking about anything else, the blackness that still swirled around in the back of his mind, the reason he wasn't going for anything more than sex with a girl who had the potential to actually be a real thing for him.

They told him that he didn't need to block it out anymore, that he had to move on and mourn but they didn't understand, and Blaine had told them as such. His real reason for going to Nightingale was far less exciting than anyone assumed, and yet more so at the same time. The images of Cooper, dead in their shared bathroom when Blaine rushed home from school one day, were still too much, even 8 years later.

He hadn't gotten into the drugs, though his parents worried that he would. Watching the descent of Cooper-once an all American athlete, honor level student, friend to all-it did more than enough of a job to keep Blaine away from them. But no one could seem to control the rage Blaine felt those first few years, escalating the summer before high school when he dragged a kid he knew was selling pot to others behind a local restaurant to beat him senseless, words being screamed from Blaine's mouth as he punched and kicked and if it wasn't for the managers of the place pulling Blaine away, the other might not have made it out so well. Blaine wasn't sure he'd have been able to stop himself.

He was pissed, and he was bitter, and he had every reason to be. Cooper had been his hero, his idol, and he ruined his life and Blaine's with it. After three years at a rehabilitation center, state mandated, Blaine had learned to control his temper-for the most part-but the emotions that went along with it lurked just under the surface, always ready to burst if someone pushed him just a little too far.

So he focused on Rachel Berry, leaving any memories in the past as best he could while trying to remind himself that getting attached was not an option.

* * *

><p>Her resistance was wearing thin.<p>

Blaine would leave her alone when Wes was around, but she was rapidly finding herself wandering around Dalton on her own for the sole hope of bumping into the boy she wasn't dating, to relish in his crude remarks that sent sparks through her skin and down to her core even as she shot them down with her own quick retorts.

She was like a moth to his flame, knowing it was a bad idea, that it was potentially dangerous-if only for her emotional wellbeing-but yet she started moving closer and closer to him. Only twice more did he push past normal social boundaries, Rachel pushing him away each time even as goose bumps crawled over her skin from his touches, her body screaming for him to come back, to touch her again, to touch her more.

She tried to play it off as a sexual attraction, and that was all it had started as. She loved Wesley, but they'd been together for so long that the sex-if it had ever been anything above average, Rachel certainly hadn't known-was dying down, Wesley barely even initiating it any more than she did. She reasoned that Blaine was exotic, in a way, different, and his eyes hypnotized her while his lips taunted with words she wanted so desperately to act upon. But she fought him off, time and time again, regained her posture as she stood straighter and smoothed her skirts, not failing to miss how his eye line watching her every move.

But there was more to it than that, and it was becoming rapidly evident to her when her fantasies were less sexually prevalent, and her curiosity about him grew.

There was something hidden within him, a sadness of sorts, and she wanted to find it and fix it and see what he'd be like if she could. If his comments that burned her skin red would halt, if he would be a better suited person for her.

It was little things that she noticed, how sometimes if she got too close, pushed too far for him he'd close off, his eyes not quite as shining and his smile not quite as wide, his attention not on her anymore. She wanted to dive in during those few seconds, pull out the boy behind the quips and leers, but he'd close her off before she even got started, only serving to frustrate her more.

The more she wanted to know him, the more strained things became between her and Wes. He seemed to notice that he wasn't the sole earner of her attention anymore, his grip tightening around her whenever Blaine appeared, even if they didn't interact when others were around. It wasn't a jealousy, or even so much possession. He didn't try and mark his territory, and for some reason this seemed to upset Rachel even more.

Wes was supposed to try harder to win her back, was supposed to put up a fight, and yet he wasn't. He didn't even say anything about it for nearly a month, until he had walked in on a heated argument between the two, Rachel's eyes wide with the shock of being caught. They hadn't even done anything, aside from maybe standing a little too close, and Wesley merely stalked off in the other direction before Rachel chased after him.

"Do you want me, still?" he had asked, her, and she nodded emphatically, shooting out a quick 'Of course I do!' because she did, she loved Wes. He was her first everything, and it pained her to think that they were falling apart simply because some boy came and lured her away.

"I love you," she promised, her voice soft but he didn't say anything in return, arms folded over his chest even as she stepped closer to him, kissing his cheek before moving towards his lips, his head turning to stop her. "Please, Wes, believe me," she whined, hurt by the rejection.

"Tell me you don't want him," Wes said, voice sharper than normal, and Rachel found herself hesitating before saying the words she knew were a lie, the words that even Wes seemed to know were a lie. "You're enraptured by him, Rachel, and I don't want to settle for only a part of you."

"Wes, it's not like that," she argued, but he was done listening, walking away from her and leaving her to sort through emotions she wasn't sure she could label so easily.

She was surprised when Wes still asked her about their plans for Dalton's winter formal, the guilt plaguing at her for even being surprised at something that should have been a given. They may have been technically dating, but it was all a pretense these days. He was shorter with her, less patient and less willing to spend time with her even when she put in as much effort as she could. This was her doing, and she knew that, but it still hurt whenever she tried to initiate contact between the two only to be rejected.

The night started off quietly, Rachel staying by Wes's side as everyone eventually filtered into the ballroom Dalton used for special occasions and their annual school dances, David cracking jokes about one thing or another while Nick and Jeff joined in. She tried to keep her eyes focused on her boyfriend, but it was only a matter of time before the entire group was distracted by raucous laughter from Sebastian, Blaine at his side and hiding his own smirk over something Rachel probably didn't want to know about.

He was like some sort of magnet to her, and now that she'd acknowledged his existence, even as he and Sebastian disappeared further away, her eyes seemed to lock onto him. Wes made some sort of grunt of disgust after a few minutes, his hand leaving hers as David disappeared with Nick and Jeff to get them all drinks, Rachel pouting as she looked up at him. "What's wrong?" she asked quietly, even if she knew that he was staring in Blaine's direction with a look of disapproval.

"If you want to go be with him so badly, why don't you?" Wes retorted just as quietly, his tone more heartbreaking than it should have been to her.

"I don't-Wes, nothing's happened between us!" she tried to defend, but he just shook his hand.

"But you want it to," he stated before walking away, and it cut deeper than an accusation of false claims would have, because it was true. She wanted Blaine in a way she couldn't explain, and his simple existence was fucking up everything for her.

She needed to stop this, needed to get Blaine out of her brain and her life back on track, which meant proving to Wes once and for all that Blaine was nothing to her. She steeled herself before storming across the room and pulling Blaine away from where Sebastian was in the middle of a story she didn't care about, Blaine muttering about at least waiting until the night was over before she paused towards the back corner, trying not to let the fact that he stopped mere inches from her affect her decision in any way.

"You need to stop," she hissed, Blaine's smirk returning easily.

"I'm not doing anything," he reminded her, and while she could have very easily rejected that statement, she crossed her arms over her chest and glared him down instead. He didn't seem bothered in the least, contradicting his statement as he wrapped a finger around a curl in her hair, the motion halting her breathing even before he leaned forward, his cheek touching hers briefly as he whispered a soft, "And if I was, it's only because you want it."

"I don't," she gulped, trying to shake the lie from her body, tried to make it a truth. "I don't want you and you need to leave me alone."

He let out a small chuckle, the action setting her skin on fire with his face so near to hers, and she fought against every muscle that screamed to turn into him, to press her mouth onto his own. "I don't really think you mean that," he said after a moment, and in a flash so quick she was sure she had imagined it, he was the one turning her face towards his, his fingers delicately placed under her chin as she felt his lips move against her, determined to get a rise out of her and for a second it worked-she gave in, even if it was only momentary, her lips parting slightly to deepen the kiss before common sense slapped back into her and she realized she was standing at the edge of a room full of people, her boyfriend among them, kissing Blaine.

She parted from him with slightly ragged breath and wide eyes, Blaine smirking in response before he turned away, heading out of the room, and Rachel didn't think twice before she chased after him, yelling about how he was ruining her life.

* * *

><p>It was almost too easy, Rachel following after him, screaming about what an asshole he was, how he needed to leave her alone, and Blaine didn't bother keeping back the laugh that escaped as he turned around, startling the girl into stopping. "You're the one coming after me, Rachel," he reminded her, and it seemed to snap her senses back in as she reached out a hand to slap him hard across the cheek. He stalled for a second, feeling the sting from her hand, a part of him wondering why she hadn't done that before.<p>

"You _know _I have a boyfriend, one I love very much, and you just come into my life and try and turn everything around-for what, your own personal enjoyment?" she yelled, Blaine moving once more further into the school, knowing she'd continue to follow him in her rage. He could have told her that no, it wasn't for his own enjoyment, and it wasn't even because Wes was an obnoxious jerkoff and Rachel was the schools princess anymore. What had started as a game between him and Sebastian had turned all too real over time, and try as Blaine might quell it, he couldn't. The more she cornered him, the more he was drawn to her, and he'd realized over the past couple weeks that he was becoming more and more attached to her.

He kept all that quiet though, knowing the second he let any of that out everything would be for naught, knowing that he could get under her skin better by playing her, because she reveled in the attention he gave her. It was different from everyone else, and that's what she wanted from him. "I was bored," he said when he realized she was still waiting for an answer. "Sebastian said there was no way I could get you to fall for someone other than Wes. I wanted to see if I could."

"Fall for-no, Blaine, god you're so _full of yourself_!" she sputtered out, looking completely aghast as they walked into the room the Warblers used for practice, Rachel pacing back and forth as her heels clicked on the tile even as Blaine made himself comfortable on the councils table.

"I'm full of myself? Princess, you think every boy in this school is in love with you and every girl at your own hates you. If anyone is full of themselves, it'd be you," he retorted, keeping himself calm even as she turned her glare on him once more.

"I had one boy, one boy who was in love with me, and now he's pissed because he thinks I'm in love with you, which is the most ridiculous-"

"You are," Blaine said simply, ignoring her small scream of frustration.

"I am not! You are an arrogant, horrible, scheming, bored-" she went on and on, listing out every negative trait she could seem to come up with off the top of her head while Blaine listened, a small smile playing on his face. The more she denied it, the more vehemently she tried to say she didn't, the more he was convinced she did. It wasn't until words like 'delinquent' and 'user' got thrown into the mix that his amusement started to ebb, to turn into anger.

"You don't know anything," he warned her, because he was tired of the lies and the accusations that he could easily clear up if he bothered to explain to people just _why _he had been at a center for troubled teens before being sent to Dalton. But he was left alone more this way, and coming from most people, being considered like that was fine. But for some reason the fact that she'd think so low of him only served to piss him off, even as her words continued.

He warned her, told her to stop, but she didn't listen and when he was moving across the room quickly only to push her against a nearby wall, she merely let out a squeal of surprise. "I told you to stop," he hissed, and she just nodded, clearly caught off guard. "Do you want to know why I came from Nightingale?" he continued, but she shook her head, her eyes wide as she tried to make herself smaller. "When I was 10, my brother offed himself," he said, ignoring her request and telling her anyways. "I was the one to find him, in our bathroom, and it shook me up. Something about walking in on your brother laying on the floor overdosed on heroin will do that to you."

"I didn't-"

"Know? No, no one does. Which is what I _liked_. So maybe you should step off your fucking high horse and get over yourself because you were just a game, Rachel Berry, and you'll never be anything more."

"I don't believe you," she whispered, her eyes imploring as she stared at him. "I don't think that's all this is to you."

"What's it going to take to prove it to you then? Fuck you and leave? Never speak to you again? Destroy your 'oh so perfect relationship' and laugh when it all blows up in your face?"

"It's all an act," she said, hitting nerves Blaine didn't want to admit he even had. "You're hiding this all and keeping up an act that you don't really believe, you don't, Blaine and this-"

He was done talking, and if she wanted to push and push and push at him until he broke, she'd only get what she was asking for, and as he collided his lips with her own she only made a tiny squeal of surprise, making no effort to push him off. "So, you think you can be the one to change my ways, huh?" he asked, growled practically as he pulled harshly at her lip with his teeth, her eyes flashing dark as his hands moved from where he was holding her against the wall down to her hips, pulling them towards him. "Think you're going to be the one to fix everything wrong with poor, sad little Blaine Anderson?"

"I didn't say that-" she argued, but he shut her up with another kiss, her mouth just as hungry for him as she deepened it, parting her lips and letting him explore her mouth as her hands wound around his neck and pulled him closer to her.

He knew that as much as he wanted to take his time and actually get to enjoy her, it would go against the point he was trying to prove, and that was the most important thing at the moment. "Why the fuck is your dress so god damn _long_?" he growled as he tried to push what felt like miles of fabric away, only for her to let out a heavy sigh and turn around, pointing to the zipper in the back. He pulled it down swiftly, pushing away fabric even if he didn't let her turn back around, her back flush against him as he let a hand trail over the soft skin on her back, moving down before slapping her ass once, quickly and sharply enough for her to let out a loud "Oh!" before he spun her back around, her mouth the one to connect to his this time.

"We really shouldn't-"

"You just helped me undo your dress, sweetheart, save your fake guilt for later," Blaine muttered, and she just nodded, undoing his belt quickly while his fingers trailed lightly over the fabric of her underwear, teasing her. "I'm assuming Montgomery has managed to get it up often enough to fuck you, right?"

"Y-yes," Rachel whispered, her voice higher and breathier than normal before he peeled off the remaining clothing standing in his way, ignoring the surge of pride that ran hot through his spine at the way he had turned her into this so quickly. He wondered, briefly, if this was how she'd always been around him, waiting for him to make a move and the thought that maybe she had been drove him to kiss her harshly, her pink tongue dancing around his own as he pushed aside her thighs slightly to give himself room between them.

"Good," he responded, breath hot and wet against her shoulder as he pushed in. "Don't want you bitching about it hurting," he groaned, her own gasp of surprise in his ear only causing him to go in deeper.

"Blaine," she let out, and he couldn't come up with anything to reply with, too busy focusing on moving inside her. He rarely cared about getting the other person off, only focusing on his own pleasure, but he knew before he even started to thrust that he'd get his and he'd get it well-she was tight around him, warm and wet and her soft whimpers mixed with nails dragging down his back was enough to push him over the edge within minutes. But he held himself back, tried to find an angle that made her practically scream out as she tightened even more around him, the word "Fuck," falling from the pretty pink lips as he put a finger up to them to quiet her down.

"Can't get caught," he said, thrusting in at every word for good measure, and he would have continued had she not sucked his finger into her mouth, her eyes a dark shade as her tongue whirled around the digit, her cheeks hollowing for a moment, and suddenly Blaine had to still himself before he came inside her. "Rach, fuck," he muttered, closing his eyes as he imagined her on her knees in front of him, mouth working just the same it was now, nearly tempted to pull out and force her into action before he pulled his finger free, a smirk on her face.

"I would, you know," she breathed against his skin, wrapping her arms tight around his neck and pushing her hips towards him to get him moving again as she trailed her tongue across his neck. "For you."

The implication of the added words 'for you' seemed almost too heavy in context, too much for what she was talking about. He realized, of course, that it meant she didn't give Wes head, and the thought made him eerily confident as he shook his head, trying not to beg her to come for him. He didn't want her knowing he cared about her pleasure at all, didn't want her knowing he cared in any aspect about her, but her breathing was picking up and becoming shorter, her hips moving at a less regular pace.

"Can't-" he said after a moment, too close to stop himself, but she just kissed him, open mouthed and desperate as he fell over the edge, a loud groan falling into her mouth as her body pulled him for everything he had inside him as she fell a moment later, her own cries just as loud.

He didn't want to pull out and leave her behind, wanted to kiss lips that were already looking red and slightly chapped from the abuse they'd taken over the past few minutes, wanted to hold her and tell her things he'd never told anyone else. But nothing terrified him more, that this girl could get him so unraveled over just a few months of pursuing her, and it was this that ultimately made him snap his pants back on, running a hand through relatively sweaty curls.

"Hate to fuck and run," he smirked, putting on his game face once more even as she tried to pull her dress back on, her head snapping up to look at him with wide eyes, sad and upset as she shook her head.

"No, what, Blaine you can't-"

"Told you this wasn't anything to me, Berry," he replied, though he had enough decency to help her zip up her dress where she couldn't reach. "It's not my fault you seemed to think your cunt holds the answers to turn any boy into Prince Charming."

He turned away from her then, seeing the start of tears forming in the corner of her eyes, heading out the door and running once he was free from it, not caring that he was in a suit, that most everyone was still in the main hall at the dance, pushing through a side door and running out until he couldn't breathe anymore.

He'd broken the only thing he'd felt anything for in almost 8 years, and he didn't think there was anything he'd ever be able to do to fix that.

* * *

><p>Rachel didn't hear Wesley's voice calling for her until he was right there, a concerned look on his face at the state of her-tears messing up her makeup, dress out of place, her hair mussed-but it disappeared once he put two and two together and realized why she was there.<p>

"Jesus, Rachel," Wes muttered, standing up and moving away from her. "Are you kidding me? An hour ago, you said he meant nothing to you-"

"He doesn't!"

"And yet you ditch out on the dance to go fuck him in the choir room?" Wes accused, and Rachel could only bring herself to sob harder, the words _destroy your oh so perfect relationship _looming at the forefront of her mind. "It's like you're not even trying anymore, Rachel, so why the hell should I?"

"No, please, don't," she choked out, trying to stand on wobbly legs as she moved towards him, but he just backed away, face distorted in disgust.

"No, Rachel, I'm done." He didn't say anything more before leaving the room, Rachel left in the middle of a place she had a sinking feeling she was no longer welcome in, the weight of everything that had taken place sinking low in her stomach, and she had no one to blame but herself.

The worst part of everything wasn't that she was completely on her own now, but that she had no escape. She was stuck at Crawford, half the Warblers wouldn't even look at her if she saw them on neutral territory, and she felt like she had no one to turn to. She'd never made a spectacular amount of friends at her own school, the girls either jealous that she spent so much time at Dalton or uninterested in her at all, and she was starting to see how much that backfired on her.

She tracked down Sebastian one day, at a coffee shop a little ways out of town, and tried to demand him to give her Blaine's phone number. He looked like he was about to waver before Thad swept in and took the other away, a look of sorrow on Sebastian's face that was completely out of character, making her feel even worse for herself than she previously had.

It was like everyone pitied her, and there was nothing she hated more.

Somehow, Blaine seemed to evade her every time she came around, under the pretense of talking to her father about college or anything she could think up, and unfortunately running into Wesley almost a week after the incident. He'd brushed by her, the cold shoulder she received almost worse than if he had yelled, and she'd had to run and hide in a spot she was sure only she knew of from hours scouring every nook and cranny of the school to break down in peace.

She wanted to want to take it back, to wish that her night with Blaine had never happened, but she couldn't. She was even more attached to him than she had been previously, and despite his ability to try and pretend he felt nothing other than a physical attraction to her, she was convinced there was something deeper from him as well. He wouldn't have told her about his brother, after all, if he didn't trust her on some level. He could try and say he didn't care all he wanted, but she didn't believe him for an instant.

The only problem was finding him and getting him to know that.

* * *

><p>Blaine was very good at hiding and repressing. It was what he did best, until it exploded inside of him and resulted in a burst of anger that no one would expect coming.<p>

But this time he wasn't angry. Not with her, at least, like he should have been. He was angry with himself, for letting her get too close, for letting this get to be more than a game to him. He wanted to pin that on her, and her nosy vaguely stalkerish ways, but he could have put an end to that quickly a long time ago if he had wanted. The truth was, he realized as he stared at the ceiling of his dorm room, he liked having her around, on some level. She was loud and opinionated and argumentative, but she wasn't afraid of him like so many others had been. Of course, she hadn't seen him at his worst, and that was the only reason she could be deluded into thinking there was some sort of connection between them.

He had no excuse.

So he hid.

Sebastian was worried about him, in that vague way that Sebastian could occasionally be concerned for another human being, but anytime he asked him about it Blaine just snapped at him, told him to shut up. The morning after, when Sebastian had come to congratulate him, he came close to punching him in the face. Blaine hadn't _won _anything, if anything he'd only ruined everything, and when Sebastian wouldn't stop, Blaine gave into the momentary desire as his fist hit Sebastian in the side. The other boy had been shocked, wincing slightly in pain, but he dropped the subject of Rachel quickly and knew better than to bring her up again.

He only saw her once in the weeks that followed, in the front hall talking to her father about something, though her eyes were running in any direction that wasn't the man in front of her, presumably looking for Blaine. He wanted to scream, wanted to tell her to leave him alone, but there was another part of him that was pleased she was still trying, still looking. He knew it was irrational and completely contradictive to everything he was trying to instill in her, but it gave him a surge of pride to know she still wanted him that badly. That even after he had destroyed her entire relationship, a large fraction of her life, she didn't seem to care.

It was enough to make his head spin.

* * *

><p>Rachel had had more than enough, it had been almost a month and her head still spun around with thoughts of nothing but Blaine. She'd moved on from Wesley properly, only feeling a twinge of guilt as she stomped into the dorm building she knew Blaine lived in, boys parting away from her as she headed towards the room number she had nearly had to blackmail to get out of Sebastian, no one questioning her sudden reappearance in the building.<p>

She knocked, quite loudly and repeatedly, until she was met with a disgruntled Blaine who appeared to have just woken up.

"Rachel?" he questioned, her face softening only momentarily at the bed head he was sporting, the tired look in his eyes, but then he was looking around her as if expecting someone else and she could only sigh indignity as she pushed him inside his own room, focusing on him and ignoring the slight thrill she got from being somewhere so intimately _him_. "Back for round two?" he smirked, leaning against a wall and seeming to collect himself.

"No!" she cried, crossing her own arms. "I'm here to ask who the hell you think you are, sleeping with me and then ignoring me for a month!"

"I told you that's how it was going to go," Blaine shrugged, though a small flicker of what looked possibly like regret took over his features and Rachel knew he felt bad about it.

"And I told you I wasn't that kind of girl, Blaine! You can't just-"

"I told you that I didn't want a girlfriend, Rachel, that I wasn't going to transform into prince charming overnight," he growled, but she stood her ground, shaking her head.

"I don't _want _you to be prince charming, which you would have known if you had bothered to stop hiding from me!" she accused, sticking a finger in his face as she continued. "But you were being a coward, running away because you know this was more than just a quick way to get off, or you wouldn't have cared about running into me. You wouldn't have purposely orchestrated it so that I never saw you."

"I didn't-" he tried to argue, but she cut him off.

"You did. I've seen Wes at least four times since our break up now, and I've seen Sebastian and David and Thad and everyone else. You're the only one I haven't. Which means you were hiding from me, and if that night meant absolutely nothing to you, why would you be hiding from me?"

"You don't get it!" he yelled, startling Rachel. "I don't," he paused, not looking at her, but this time she waited patiently for the words to come out, knowing that when they did-it would make or break them, she was sure. "I don't do feelings, or being someone's boyfriend, or any of that bullshit. It's just going to end in someone-probably you-getting hurt, so why would I put time and effort into it?"

"Because you care about me," she said quietly, taking a step forward. "Whether you want to or not, Blaine, you do." He didn't argue her statement, even as her hand rested upon his arm, holding him slightly as she continued. "And you can try and deny it, but the fact is you're not. And I'm not expecting you to be Wesley-Blaine, if I wanted that, I'd still be with him. What I want is you-as complicated and strong headed and difficult as you are, you're the one I want to be with."

He continued to stay silent, his face turned away from hers as he stared at something in the distance, but Rachel knew he was giving in, that he wasn't fighting it as much, and she took a chance as she raised her hand to turn his head towards her. "You can still be you and be with me."

He made some sort of non-committal grunt, as if he didn't truly believe her, but she figured the only shot she had was to show him, and as she pulled him down to kiss her, she planned on doing just that.

* * *

><p>"I hope you don't expect me to come over here every time you call," Blaine said as he appeared in her doorway, a look of annoyance washing over his features as she grinned, pleased he had came.<p>

"I don't expect you to go and change everything about yourself, Blaine," she responded easily, repeating the same sentiments she'd been saying for nearly a month now as she grabbed onto his hand and pulling him deeper into the room, Blaine kicking her door shut behind them. "And I promise, I can definitely make your trek worth your while," she continued, leaning up on her toes to kiss him.

He responded eagerly enough, and while she had expected him to push for more straight away he seemed content to just kiss as they stood in the middle of her room, the sunlight warming the back of her bare legs as his free hand not interlaced in her own wound in her hair to pull her closer. It wasn't rushed, and hard, and it wasn't about just connecting and getting off this time. Blaine, despite his ways, cared about her, cared about her enough to fix what he had been sure he had broken. And Rachel, despite her common sense screaming at her to run, had let him, had pushed for him to.

She was the one to pull them onto the bed, leading him as she moved backwards before falling onto the mattress, her hands on his hips as he chuckled darkly against her mouth. "Are you trying to seduce me, Ms. Berry?" he asked, moving his teeth across her neck and eliciting a soft gasp from her.

"Yes," she responded. "Yes I am."

It wasn't like the first time, where she had pushed and pushed until he snapped and had his way with her. Not that she had minded it, in the moment, it had seemed like it was how it was supposed to be with him. But this time, the first time since, even if he didn't want to acknowledge it, his touches were gentler as his hands ghosted across her skin and removed her clothing, his eyes softer as they took in her body, their movements almost lazy and relaxed as they went through familiar motions, finding the right spots on each other's bodies to push them over the edge. It was almost sweet, in a way, though she knew better than to speak the words aloud and scare him off. There was still so much of him that was fighting this, that wanted to be the him he was at Dalton, the image he had built up so ingrained inside him that it only broke in moments of extreme vulnerability.

It was going to be difficult, she knew, to keep her head around him. She could already envision screeching fights between the two of them, fixed with desperate sex as a way to say words Blaine wasn't ready to tell her yet. But as she lay in his arms, the sun fading from the window beside them as she drifted off into a half-sleep, barely conscious, she could feel his fingers tracing over her cheek, felt the words 'I love you' muttered almost silently into her forehead as he placed a kiss there, and she knew no matter how much work it was, she was in for the long haul.


End file.
